Journey Through The Wasteland
Dear Drew-
I am an African-American girl going to college right now, and I have not had any luck dating. In my experience, most Caucasian guys are not interested in dating African-American girls. This is very frustrating for me, and often makes for uncomfortable social situations. Do you have any advice?
- Take Me As I Am
Dear Take Me As I Am,
I've been blessed to have had various romantic encounters and/or experiences with women from many different ethnic backgrounds. I doubt I made it a point to pursue any of them strictly because of their ethnicity, but I certainly saw their nationality as an important and interesting detail of their identity.
Why?
Because it's who they are. Because it's something to be proud of.
I'm not here to gauge your personal supply of black pride, but I hope you know that whether or not the male populace on your particular campus can appreciate the myriad of traits that comprise you, the most important goal to have in your burgeoning romantic life is to embrace YOU.
Sometimes being unique means being lonely. I've often felt a profound sense of alienation in my years, descending into a defeatist view that a real, profound connection was impossible.
I felt stuck in a romantic wasteland. Hopeless.
Until I met a girl I didn't think existed.
Everything changed. Everything opened up and I finally found someone I could share everything with, enjoy every ounce of the day with. I realized there was a lot more to that wasteland than I'd seen.
It's not your job to decipher whether guys are secretly racist or secretly just not that into you (but you're human, so I'm guessing you'll try to figure out anyways.) Men and women will always find things about one another that turn them off, both external and internal.
So what this brings us back to is that timeless, enigmatic subject of self-love.
Do you love yourself for who you are?
If you really do, you won't settle for less than you deserve or desire. If someone doesn't see what you see, doesn't understand how much you have to offer, then you've no use for a pair of blind eyes.
It is my belief that the qualities a great woman possesses can transcend any racial, political, or ideological boundary line.
Finding a place to belong is tougher for some of us than others. When we find that place, or rather, when we find that person, we realize the journey was absolutely worth it.
Here's to your journey.
Send all of your questions to askdrewlindo@gmail.com.
I am an African-American girl going to college right now, and I have not had any luck dating. In my experience, most Caucasian guys are not interested in dating African-American girls. This is very frustrating for me, and often makes for uncomfortable social situations. Do you have any advice?
- Take Me As I Am
Dear Take Me As I Am,
I've been blessed to have had various romantic encounters and/or experiences with women from many different ethnic backgrounds. I doubt I made it a point to pursue any of them strictly because of their ethnicity, but I certainly saw their nationality as an important and interesting detail of their identity.
Why?
Because it's who they are. Because it's something to be proud of.
I'm not here to gauge your personal supply of black pride, but I hope you know that whether or not the male populace on your particular campus can appreciate the myriad of traits that comprise you, the most important goal to have in your burgeoning romantic life is to embrace YOU.
Sometimes being unique means being lonely. I've often felt a profound sense of alienation in my years, descending into a defeatist view that a real, profound connection was impossible.
I felt stuck in a romantic wasteland. Hopeless.
Until I met a girl I didn't think existed.
Everything changed. Everything opened up and I finally found someone I could share everything with, enjoy every ounce of the day with. I realized there was a lot more to that wasteland than I'd seen.
It's not your job to decipher whether guys are secretly racist or secretly just not that into you (but you're human, so I'm guessing you'll try to figure out anyways.) Men and women will always find things about one another that turn them off, both external and internal.
So what this brings us back to is that timeless, enigmatic subject of self-love.
Do you love yourself for who you are?
If you really do, you won't settle for less than you deserve or desire. If someone doesn't see what you see, doesn't understand how much you have to offer, then you've no use for a pair of blind eyes.
It is my belief that the qualities a great woman possesses can transcend any racial, political, or ideological boundary line.
Finding a place to belong is tougher for some of us than others. When we find that place, or rather, when we find that person, we realize the journey was absolutely worth it.
Here's to your journey.
Send all of your questions to askdrewlindo@gmail.com.
posted by Drew at
6:50 PM
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